funny quotes

Graphics code for: Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!

Graphics code for: Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"

Graphics code for: I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks.

Graphics code for: My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.

Graphics code for: Never rely on the glory of the morning nor the smiles of your mother-in-law.

Graphics code for: The big thieves hang the little ones.

Graphics code for: The capital of California is "C".....isn't it

Graphics code for: The only things you ever make are mistakes and cigarette ashes.

Graphics code for: Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

Graphics code for: Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!

Graphics code for: Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.